I like yoga but I can hardly meditate. I cannot empty my mind. I never understood how one could not think about anything. A big example: my husband
When I and my husband first started to date I would talk and he would listen. (Later on, he figured he needed to talk to shut me up) There would be long pauses of (awkward for me) silence, when I stopped talking. Then I would ask, “What are you thinking?”. Because during those pauses of silence I would be thinking a lot of stuff including, wondering what he’s thinking. His answer would always be “Nothing!”.
What did he mean “nothing”? Nothing? How?
I thought, he just didn’t want to share what he was thinking with me, because it is, still to this day, impossible for me to comprehend the notion of “not thinking of anything” or “thinking nothing“.
And this continued for years, until last weekend. We went to MSI Chicago, as I’ve shared in this Roboweek post. There is a station called “Mindball“. Players wear headbands equipped with metal sensors to detect the (alpha and theta) brainwaves, and try to relax. There is a ball in the middle of the table which moves, from the player who relaxes more and lowers his/her brainwaves more than his/her opponent.
We got in line. Waited, watching two females, two males (father and son), a male/female playing. Some quickly beating the opponent, some giving each other hard time. Then our turn came. I was thinking, “I’ll take deep breaths, relax etc“. We put the headbands on. The attendant reset the game and it started. It took two seconds for my husband send the mindball to my court. Literally. In the 2 seconds he went into hibernation, I thought of million things. Look at the picture, where obviously I am “Player 2” on the right and my brain waves are off the chart. I, just, could not stop my brain. Just as I cannot stop it when I go to bed and put my head on the pillow.
Now I understand (and believe) what my husband means, when he is not thinking anything.
Now, the only thing is…
How does he do that? (*envy*)
Renee K says
You are not alone. Meditation is an on-going practice and like you, I have not mastered it. I think as the “mama” there are a lot of expectations placed on us to “remember this” and “don’t forget that.” We have conditioned ourselves to keep our minds twirling. So….of course it takes us longer to unwind and let go-we haven’t practiced that activity in quite some time! 🙂 Be well!
teresa mccluskey says
I guess I can no longer get mad at the hubs when he says I am not thinking of anything huh? LOL. I can never stop thinking, its always oh did i get that at the store, crap I left something at home, the kids, or lordy they are to quite lol, that just some! So you are not alone! Btw, I found your blog on the Bloggy Moms Hop, I hope you can come visit me as well 😀